Can you pay a family member to provide your care?
Short answer
Sometimes. Council direct payments generally cannot be used to pay a close family member who lives with you, though councils have discretion in exceptional circumstances. A relative who lives elsewhere can usually be employed as your personal assistant, and friends can be too — subject to the council agreeing it meets your assessed needs.
If the council has assessed you as eligible for care and support, you can ask for your personal budget as a direct payment — cash paid to you so you arrange your own care instead of receiving services the council commissions. Whether that money can go to family depends on where they live.
The family rules
- Close family living with you: direct payments generally cannot be used to pay them. Councils have discretion to allow it in exceptional circumstances — for example, where no other appropriate care is available — but that is the exception, not the rule.
- Family who live elsewhere: a relative who does not live with you can usually be employed as your personal assistant (PA) in the normal way.
- Friends: generally yes — a friend can be employed as your PA like anyone else, provided the council agrees the arrangement meets your assessed needs and is cost-effective.
What employing your own carer involves
Paying someone through a direct payment makes you an employer, with real responsibilities: a written contract, at least the National Minimum Wage, payroll and National Insurance, and paid holiday. You do not have to work this out alone — your local direct payment support service provides model contracts, payroll help, and DBS-checking guidance free of charge.
Direct payments are entirely optional. If you would rather the council arranged services, you can ask for commissioned care instead, and you can switch between the two if your circumstances change. If the person needing care lacks capacity to manage the money, a suitable person — a family member or professional deputy — can receive and manage the payments on their behalf, provided the council is satisfied the arrangement is in their best interests.
One thing a direct payment is not: a wage for informal caring. If you are the carer rather than the person needing care, look separately at a carer's assessment and carer support in your own right.
Related guides
Personal Budgets Explained
This guide explains how councils calculate your personal budget — the process, the resource allocation system, and how to challenge a budget you believe is too low. For information about taking that budget as cash and employing your own carers, see our guide on <a href="/care-later-life/direct-payments">direct payments</a>. A personal budget is the amount of money a local council allocates to meet a person's eligible social care needs. It is the cornerstone of personalised care — giving you information about the resources available so you can plan care that suits your life. A personal budget can be managed in different ways, including as a direct payment.
5 min
Council Social Care Support
Local councils in England have legal duties under the Care Act 2014 to promote people's wellbeing, prevent care needs from developing, and meet eligible care and support needs. Understanding what you are entitled to — and how to enforce those rights — is essential when navigating the system.
6 min
Carer's Assessment: Your Rights
If you provide unpaid care for a family member or friend, you have a legal right to a carer's assessment from your local council. The assessment looks at your caring role, your own needs and wellbeing, and what support would help you sustain caring without it affecting your health. It is free and does not depend on the financial situation of the person you care for.
5 min
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